Flawed (The Mercenary Series Book 3) Read online

  Flawed

  The Mercenary Series

  Book Three

  Marissa Farrar

  TABLE OF CONTENTS

  *You can click on the title to be taken to the selection. Additionally, clicking on the chapter titles will bring you back to the table of contents.

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-one

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Chapter Twenty-three

  Chapter Twenty-four

  Chapter Twenty-five

  Chapter Twenty-six

  Chapter Twenty-seven

  Chapter Twenty-eight

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-one

  About the Author

  Also by the Author

  Copyright Information

  Chapter One

  V

  I was discharged from the hospital within forty-eight hours.

  My injuries from the car accident, and from being choked for the second time by Tony the Hound, hadn’t left me reeling as much as the news of my pregnancy.

  Of course, Tony wouldn’t be strangling anyone ever again. X had shot him, and, for all I knew, Tony’s body was still lying cold on his office floor.

  Considering everything that had happened, X had insisted we get out of New York. For once, I didn’t argue with him. Worry for my sister’s safety constantly gnawed at my guts, but I had something else to consider now—something that was bigger than me.

  I was carrying X’s baby.

  I was still stunned at the news. Perhaps it was stupid of me, and I should have put two and two together much sooner, but I hadn’t. Now I needed some time to come to terms with the idea of being a mother. X’s reaction to the news was more than I could have hoped for, and I did my best not to feel completely overwhelmed.

  “Morning, sleepyhead,” X said with a smile as he walked into the bedroom. It was true. I was sleeping now like I had never done before in my life—ten hours straight last night. My body obviously needed the rest.

  I smiled back at him as he walked through wearing only a pair of boxer shorts which left very little to the imagination. Not that I needed to imagine anything—I’d seen it all plenty of times now.

  We’d rented a cabin in the Catskill Mountains, a few hours’ drive north of New York City. It was out of season, so we’d gotten a good price and no one else was around. X had used some of the fake ID he had to rent the place. It felt good to be away from the city, and other people. I was enjoying waking to the feel of X’s arms around me, and the sound of birdsong outside the window. He’d tried to convince me to stick to the Mexico plan, but this was as far as I’d allow him to take me from the city.

  It felt strange forcing myself to think about me for once. My body was no longer my own. My life was now bigger than just my own consciousness. In order to protect the little life growing inside me, I had to also take care of myself. That wasn’t something I was used to doing. I was normally perfectly happy to throw myself into the middle of danger, but now that choice had been taken away from me to a certain extent. I didn’t know how I felt about that. Was it freeing or frustrating? Perhaps a little of both.

  “I brought you some hot tea,” he said, setting the mug down on the bedside table. “I know it’s the only thing you can stomach first thing.”

  “Thanks.”

  I reached up to pull him back onto the bed with me, so I could curl up against his strong body. It felt strangely domesticated—me, pregnant, and the father of my baby bringing me tea in bed first thing in the morning. If we weren’t both killers, and hiding out from the mafia, I’d almost think we were normal.

  The massive bruising on the side of X’s face, which he’d sustained from the car accident, had started to fade, so only small blotches of green and blue remained. He’d kept the beard, though he had trimmed it down. He claimed it was because the wrong people were less likely to recognize him, but I think he just liked it. I didn’t mind; I did, too. It made him look rugged, and less severe than when I’d first met him.

  We’d been at the cabin for a week now, and I was healing well. My throat was still a little sore, and, like X, I still had some bruising, but otherwise I was fine. X, however, was treating me as though I was a china cup that might shatter. For the moment, I was enjoying having him fussing over me, though I had the feeling it might grow old very quickly.

  One thing came between us.

  He got angry with me if I even dared to mention either my sister or father. It was as though he thought they might just disappear from my mind if I didn’t talk about them. I knew he thought I should forget my old family. We were creating a new one, and I should put that first, but it wasn’t so easy for me. I’d been watching out for Nicole my whole life, and I couldn’t just change the way I felt because I was pregnant. The thought of her living under my father’s roof while I was out here playing happy families made me sick to my stomach. I didn’t want to think about it, while it played on my mind constantly. It wasn’t something I was going to be able to escape, simply by hiding out in the forest. My past would catch up with me eventually. I hated that my father was out of prison and would go without punishment for what he did to our family.

  Nicole had turned eighteen when I’d been in the hospital. Thinking of how she might have spent her day twisted something inside me. Had our father attempted to celebrate—given her presents or bought her a cake? I couldn’t imagine she’d have been in much of a mood for celebrating. She’d have been mourning the loss of the man she’d been seeing—Mateo. Our father had shot Mateo back at Tony’s house, right in front of her. I knew how intensely a first love was felt, and how much pain she must be in. I couldn’t imagine how much hate she must be feeling toward our father right now. My hate for him ran deep, but now she had twice the reason I did. Stupidly, the selfish part of me hoped what my father had done might make Nickie see me differently now. Maybe she’d understand that what had happened with our mother hadn’t been my fault, and that there had been nothing more I’d been able to do about her death. Or did she hate me even more because I’d left with X and abandoned her at Tony the Hound’s house? Maybe she believed if I hadn’t left with him, our father would have gotten what he wanted—my death—and he’d have left Mateo alone.

  It was impossible for me to predict what Nicole was thinking. The way things were looking right now, I didn’t know if I’d ever get to see her again.

  We still didn’t know who had been responsible for the car accident. Had we just been in the wrong place at the wrong time, or had the whole thing been orchestrated? If it had, it meant someone had been watching us the whole time, and had predicted our movements after leaving Tony’s house. They must have predicted that we were going to take that route, which meant they’d also known I would have gone straight from Tony’s to my father’s house. Only one man would have known that would be what I’d do, and that was my father himself.

  Or perhaps the whole thing had been one big accident. The truck had been reported as stolen, which was perhaps the reason why the driver had taken off, and the driver of the car that had hi
t us couldn’t be held to blame considering we were the ones who’d effectively run the red light.

  We were healing, regrouping, gathering our thoughts and coming to terms with our new situation.

  Yet part of me was convinced my father was always one step ahead of me, and that he knew exactly where we were.

  X moved in behind me and pulled me against him, so my bottom fitted into his crotch, my back against his stomach. He swept my hair away from my neck and kissed me on the spot where my neck met my shoulder, causing pleasurable shivers to course through me. His fingers fanned my naked, still-flat stomach, though I didn’t know how much longer it would be that way. We’d been at the cabin for a week now, and I’d stayed in the hospital for a couple of days, which meant I was now approaching seven weeks pregnant. I was going to need pre-natal appointments, but for the moment, putting myself in the system was too dangerous. I didn’t want to give my father a way of tracking me down. Instead, I’d bought numerous pregnancy books and read them cover to cover. I’d gone from a woman who knew absolutely nothing about being pregnant, to practically being an expert. It was as though I felt that by loading myself up on knowledge, I could prevent anything bad from happening.

  “I can’t wait until you start getting bigger,” he said against my ear. “You’re going to be so sexy, all big and round.”

  I delivered him an elbow to the ribs, making him laugh and protest all at the same time. “If I was more sensitive, I’d think you’d were complaining I was too skinny.”

  “You’re perfect just the way you are, but don’t think for a minute that I’m going to start complaining about these.” His hands crept around my body again, but this time slid up to lightly cup my breasts. Though I was only a matter of a few weeks pregnant, my tits already felt like they were twice the size—swollen and sensitive.

  “If you touch them any harder than that, you’re going to get another elbow,” I warned.

  He laughed. “It’s like a form of torture to a man, you know, to watch your partner’s breasts turn into something that should belong on a swimsuit model, but not be allowed to touch them.”

  “Oh, you can touch. Lightly, very lightly. Any more than that and you’re banned for the next nine months, at least.”

  He nuzzled into my neck again. “You’re a cruel woman.”

  He didn’t think I was that cruel, or else he liked it. I could feel how he wanted me, digging into my backside. Not that I minded. It turned out being pregnant caused everything to be even more sensitive down there, and I was having some crazily filthy dreams that frankly made me blush, and it took a lot to make me blush.

  Heeding my warning, his hand slipped down my body again, grazing past my stomach this time and slipping beneath my underwear.

  His fingers trailed through my pubic hair and then moved between my legs. I opened my thighs for him, letting out a sigh, as his lips feathered across my shoulder and neck. His fingers pushed inside me, and I moaned, twisting so I was able to kiss him. He always knew exactly what my body wanted and needed. I was still in a half sleepy mood, and letting my eyes slip shut while X pushed his fingers inside me felt incredible.

  He shifted his position, so his erection pushed at my entrance from behind. I knew what he wanted. I reached back, giving a tug at his shorts to let him know it was okay. Before he’d found out about my pregnancy, X would have pinned me down and taken what he wanted, but now he was more tentative around me—gentle—and he wanted to make sure I was up for it before assuming. Quickly, he rid himself of his shorts, and I rolled my panties down my legs and kicked them off under the covers. It was too cold for me to go without the blankets. It was another reason we couldn’t stay here forever. Another few weeks, and we’d start seeing snow, and then we’d struggle to get out to pick up supplies. Plus, I didn’t want to be snowed in here while pregnant. This was my first, and at some point I was going to want the security of doctors and hospitals around me.

  From behind, X pushed into me, slow and deep. I pressed my bottom back on him, loving the feel of him inside me. We moved together, X with his hands on my hips, keeping my movements slow to match his. His arm beneath my body reached around farther, pressing between my thighs to find my clit. The moment his fingers touched me there, it was like electricity being applied to my body. I bucked on him and gasped, feeling my inner muscles clench hard around him.

  “Ah, fuck, Vee,” he said, his teeth pressing against my shoulder as though he wanted to bite but was holding himself back.

  The slow pace we’d maintained vanished as lust and the promise of orgasm took hold. He flipped me right over, so I was on my front. I propped myself on my elbows, so I didn’t squash my ridiculously oversized breasts. X drove into me from behind, hard and fast. I glanced over my shoulder at him, to catch the intensity on his face, his teeth clenched, his blue eyes almost angry. His fingers worked back on my clit as he fucked me, and I turned back to concentrate on my own orgasm. It was so close now, and I squeezed my eyes shut, the familiar building of tension deep in my lower belly. It powered over me, so much more intensely now I was pregnant, the feeling making my eyes roll in my head and my toes curl. I batted X’s hand away from my clit, too sensitive to touch now. He grabbed my hip again and thrust another couple of times before letting out a groan of his own and jerking deep inside me.

  We stayed together, catching our breath, and then he leaned over me and placed a kiss in the middle of my back. My skin was damp from perspiration, and the combination of his kiss and the chill in the air made me shiver.

  He pulled out then tugged me down into bed. I was wet between my thighs, but I didn’t mind. I liked to feel a part of him there.

  A sudden twinge of pain twisted my stomach and I winced.

  X’s hand was immediately on my belly. “Are you okay?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, just a few cramps.”

  His expression grew worried. “Is that normal?”

  “Yes, it’s normal. Just everything changing down there.” I’d read about how it was normal to have small cramps and even some spotting in the early months. I’d also read that having sex was perfectly safe, and I didn’t want him to worry about that. I’d hate it if he felt he couldn’t touch me.

  Filled with bliss, I cuddled up to him and tried not to think about all the potential things that might go wrong.

  Chapter Two

  X

  We couldn’t stay like this forever.

  As happy as I was living in our little bubble, I knew it wouldn’t last. Someone would track us down eventually, and when they did, they’d kill us.

  My instinct was to protect Vee and the baby growing inside her. I’d never experienced anything so fiercely before. I wanted her to forget about her father and sister, for us to get new identities and run away to somewhere hot and foreign. She wouldn’t even entertain the idea.

  I’d spent many nights, lying awake while Vee slept soundly beside me, trying to figure out what to do. As far as I could tell, my only option was to leave Vee here, in relative safety, while I returned to New York to kill her father and hopefully find her sister safe and well. Vee wanted her sister to come with us, but she was blind when it came to Nicole. Her sister was an adult now, as she’d just turned eighteen. If their father was dead, Nicole would be able to go on and live out her life however she wanted. I doubted she’d want anything to do with us.

  Vee drifted back into a doze after we’d made love. I watched her for a while, marveling in the fact this beautiful, fierce woman was carrying my child. I wished we were normal people, and were doing this in a home of our own, with access to medical care, and friends and family around the corner. Would Vee ever go for a life like that? Would I? I’d never thought of us in such a domestic situation, but now, with a baby on the way, everything had changed.

  I found myself pondering questions I’d never considered before. What if my child found out his or her father was a killer? How would that affect them in later life? Would they want anything to do with me, or woul
d they see me for the monster I was? I couldn’t stand the thought of raising a child, only for them to disown me as they got older.

  No, I couldn’t think that way. The child would never find out. I’d make sure of it. We’d get so far away from our old lives, no one would ever find out who we’d been.

  I just had to convince Vee that was the right thing to do.

  Not wanting to mull over my thoughts any longer, I got up and quietly dressed. I wasn’t quiet enough, however, as Vee stirred.

  “Hey,” she said, her voice thick from sleep. “Where are you going?”

  “We need some stuff from the store. Are you going to be all right here alone for an hour?”

  She rubbed her eyes and sat up. “Sure. I’ll take a bath and read for a while. It’ll be good to have some peace and quiet.” She gave me a wink to show she was joking. It had been crazily quiet, just the two of us here. Not that we minded. We enjoyed each other’s company, and after the madness of the past month, we both appreciated the peace and solitude.

  I left the bedroom to head to the front door.

  “Hey,” Vee called out to me before I reached it.

  I poked my head back around the bedroom door.

  “Bring me back donuts.”

  I grinned at her. “Anything to fatten you up.”

  She picked up a pillow and threw it at me. I ducked out of the doorway, right before it landed on the floor mere inches from where I’d been.

  “Lock the door behind me,” I called out to her.

  I grabbed my jacket from the hooks beside the front door. Both Vee and I had needed to do some shopping before we’d come down here, as neither of us had anything to our names. Vee had delighted in being able to buy everything with a stretchy waistline, even though she still looked as slim as she always had. I guessed that would change, though I had no idea how quickly. I’d never paid any attention to pregnant women before her.